11/18/1999

Today is the anniversary of the bonfire collapse in 1999. 

I was asleep in my bed (right across the street from campus) when my phone rang.  It was my mom asking if I had heard the news.  Obviously I hadn’t.  I woke my roommate up and we all got dressed quickly and headed over to the site.  What I saw when I got there was unlike anything I could have imagined. I truly don’t even know how to describe the scene other than to say it felt like a major crime scene or natural disaster.  It was still early and the shock was still very real.  No one spoke.  The only sounds were tears and voices from the rescue workers.

Later in the day we went back to the site because I couldn’t stay away.  Later in the day camera crews and media from around the state and eventually around the nation were on site.  I cried and cried for no reason other than Texas A&M is who I am.  Those kids crushed alive were my people.  I felt a kinship and a fear and a pain so deep inside my heart that I didn’t know how to process it all.

That night there was a memorial/prayer service and it was probably the single most emotional experience of my life.  Inside of Reed Arena was an incredibly respectful, and heartfelt service for the entire community to participate in (and it was standing room only).  Outside it sounded like a war zone.  Media helicopters circled constantly.  Like I say, it was one of the single most significant events of my life.

All of this was emotional, and sad and terrible.  The shining light in all were the Aggie Rings left by students at the site.  As an Aggie my most important, prized and loved possession is my Aggie ring (then and now).  Several dozen students didn’t know how to express their emotions so they did the only thing they could think of.  They left their most prized possession at the foot of bonfire in honor and respect and memory of those people who unknowingly gave their lives to the school we all loved. 

I love Texas A&M, I love College Station, and I love Bonfire.  I am thankful that I was a student before Bonfire fell because I was present at 4 bonfires.  I am even more thankful that I was a student when Bonfire fell.  That tragedy bonded us to each other in the way that only a tragedy can. 

One final thought.  The weekend after Bonfire fell I had to get out of College Station.  It was just too sad.  I drove to Austin of all places to stay with my best friend Amber.  I am forever thankful that I was able to see and hear the Austin/longhorn reaction first hand.  The radio stations were talking of nothing else than how the longhorn community could support the Aggies in this time of tragedy.  All conversation and thoughts were of support and love from the longhorns to the Aggies.  In this tumultuous time of Texas A&M leaving t.u. to go to the SEC and all the hurt feelings that go along with it, I wish we could see a glimpse of what I saw that weekend.  I wish we could remember that off the football field we really are in the this together.  Our schools have a rich tradition of rivalry and sometimes hatred, but deep down we are on the same team.  But thank the Lord we beat the Hell Out of t.u. The 12th Man won that game because there was no way we were going to lose.

As Reed likes to say ‘Gig em, Aggies’

Day 18

Today I am thankful to hear the following words out of Reed’s mouth, ‘Mom-ma, my tummy hurts’.  Stay with me, I’m not crazy and I’m not thankful that my little boy is sick.

I am thankful that he can finally verbalize what he is feeling.  Being the mom of a small child is so hard when they are sick.  They can’t tell you what’s wrong, they only know they hurt and so they do the only thing they know how to do…they cry.  I feel like we have reached a significant milestone since he can specifically tell me what is wrong.  He even pointed to a specific part of his tummy as the pain point (don’t worry, it is on the left side of his belly right above his waist.  If it was on the right side we would be on our way to the doctor to rule out appendix issues.)

Day 17

Today I am thankful for Thanksgiving.  I know that sounds strange, but I finally have a break in the storm at work and I am making my Thanksgiving lists.  HEB lists, recipe lists, invite lists, etc.  We are doing Reasonover/Baldwin/Killam Thanksgiving this Saturday and I need to get myself organized.  I am thankful for my favorite holiday.  Thankgiving is a cook’s holiday which makes it my favorite (except Easter, and birthdays, ok I really love all holidays.)

Day 16

Today I am thankful for the doctor who delivered Reed.  (You can read about it here: http://blogs.randybaldwin.com/family/2009/03/true-knot-baby/)

Dr. Gonima truly saved Reed’s life by making the executive decision to perform a c-section.  I didn’t have a birth plan, but I didn’t want a c-section.  Dr. Gonima overrulled me and I am forever grateful to him.  I am reminded to be thankful for Dr. Gonima today because I got to spend my lunch hour with my sweet almost 3 year old little boy for his Thanksgiving luncheon at school.  Oh how I love that silly goose!

Day 15

Today is a bit of a repeat, but I am thankful for the RAIN!! 

Rain is necessary for the soul.  South Texas is in the worst drought in over 100 years and today the Lord is letting the rain fall down.  The only thing that would make this better is if I wasn’t at work.

Day 14

Today I am thankful for smaller pants. 

I realize this might seem crazy selfish , but it is what I’m thankful for today.  Having children can really do a number on a mom’s self esteem.  Over the course of 9 months you gain weight, have your skin and joints stretched farther than ever before, some people have terrible acne (luckily I dodged that bullet) and we won’t even go into all the other things that happen when you are pregnant.  Then you have your baby and she/he is adorable and everyone is so happy for the mom and the baby and everything is beautiful.  Then time passes and the baby stays cute but the mom gets spit up on and pooped on, some days she doesn’t get a shower, many days she has to change clothes 3 or 4 times, she doesn’t get any sleep, and if she is like me…she is 100% unable to lose weight while nursing. 

Everyone assumes that all women lose weight while breastfeeding.  Let me assure you, this is incorrect.  Losing weight while nursing is actually pretty polarizing, either you drop weight easily while nursing, or you absolutely can’t.  I absolutely can’t.  My body goes into starvation mode and holds onto every single pound. 

Wow.  where did that come from?  I didn’t mean to go into quite such a rant, but there you have it.  I have finally stopped nursing and I have lost 25 pounds.  Thank the Lord for smaller pants!!  (And the dedication to dieting 🙂 )

Day 13

Today I am thankful for afternoon naps.  Ali and Reed both woke up WAY too early this morning (like before 7am!) and we were all dragging into church.

After lunch the entire family went to sleep.  Randy and I each got to sleep like 2 hours (unheard of!) and Reed slept for 2.5hours and Ali slept for over 3 hours.  She would have slept longer if I hadn’t woken her up.  We all needed the rest and we were all MUCH happier when we woke up.

Day 12

Today I’m thankful that I live in South Texas.  For all the terribly dry and hot summers we suffer through, the rest of the year is pretty fantastic.  We left Colorado and it was 18 degrees.  We landed in San Antonio and it was 80.  I got married on December 3rd and it was 85 degrees and sunny.  Nothing like living in the tropics 🙂

 

Month 10

Alison you are already 10 months old.  This year is seriously flying by.  Here are my top 10 things about you this month.

1. You finally sleep through the night!!  Praise the Lord for this one.  You are ready for bed by 7:30 (although I wish I could keep you up later) and you wake up hun-gry at 5:30 or 6.

2. You have gotten another tooth and are up to 2 on the bottom and one on the top

3. You still wear size 2 diapers and can fit into 6 month onesies (the one in the picture below is a 6- 9 month)  You are a petite little thing so far

4. You are a crazy picky eater.  You have decided you are completely finished with baby food.  Only table food for you.  The only things I know I can always get you to eat are oatmeal, yogurt, banana, cheerios and scrambled eggs.  If you are in the right mood you are pretty adventurous, but you are a very social eater.  You really only want what we are eating and if no one is eating with you sometimes you fight us at mealtimes.  I’m still trying to find what veggies you will eat.

5. You are crawling, and pulling up, and cruising as much as possible.  You really are so fast.  You stood all by yourself for about 5-7 seconds the other day and I know I was impressed.  You are physically ready to stand and walk, but you are too lazy to move your feet.  Funny little girl.  I think the biggest problem is that you LOVE to be held.  Every single time I see you at day care someone is holding you.  At home every.single.time I put you down you wimper and pretend to cry.  You are a sneaky one.

6. Bathtime is hands down your favorite time of the day.  You go completely nuts when you hear Daddy turn on the tub.

7. You have 3 consistent words: Da-Da (your first), Momma and ‘nana’ (banana).  You are already so much more verbal than Reed was.  I’m not sure if it’s because you want in on the conversation you see us having with Reed or if its because you are a woman, or if it’s just your personality…but I love it!!  You love to make noise and ‘talk’ to us

8. You can clap and wave and point.  You get so proud of yourself and it is SO cute!! 

9. One of my other favorite things that you do is when you blow raspberries with your tongue.  You really love this one.  You also love to blow kisses.  Not blow them with your hands, but jsut give air kisses.  You love, love, love to make that sound with your mouth.

10.  You are truly the smiliest baby around.  I know I say that all the time…but its true.  The ladies at day care love you so much and every time I go pick you up one of them is telling me how they ‘stole’ you that day.  This makes me so stinking happy.  You also LOVE your brother.  I really am a broken record on that one…but you two have such a special bond at this young age.  I love watching it develop.

Man I love you sweet girl.

Day 11

Today is Veterans Day, so it is the easiest post to write.  I am immensely thankful to anyone who serves this country.  I come from a very dedicated military family (my parents met on a blind date when they were in the Navy) and I am lucky enough to be constantly reminded of what an honorable choice it is to serve this country.

Thank you to both of my grandfathers, my grandmother Killiam, both of my parents, all 3 of my mother’s siblings and my cousin Julie Anne.  This country is safer, stronger, and more connected because of what you do.

Thank you!!!!!